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You must be logged in to use this feature. Welcome to Sex Qs, a weekly column where The Globe's Amberly McAteer seeks answers to your sex questions, talking to sexperts and regular Canadians alike. Wife want casual sex Hagan wife and I are both 49 and have been together for 23 years.

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Our marriage is wonderful in every way — except that for most of the last 19 years, she has not been interested in sex. She seems to tolerate it, but is passive and never initiates it.

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I cannot tell you how dispiriting it is to have Columbus-NJ young milf long-term sexual partner with very little willingness and enthusiasm for the deed! As I'm at my Wife want casual sex Hagan end, we have discussed this for hours over the last few weeks, she acknowledges her lack of interest and understands my frustration.

In fact, she's given me the green light to get this all out of my system by having casual sex with others. So what now — Internet dating? Am Zex just playing with fire?

I'm stumped — and saddened by your question. As a single girl, your long, happy marriage is something I envy.

I wish you could tell me the passion is still burning hot. But because the Wife want casual sex Hagan have died down, my knee-jerk reaction is, "Yes, go have your sex! If I'm this befuddled, I can ses imagine what you're going through. My advice — call me a prude — is to direct your energy toward your wife, not your extracurricular aspirations. Let's get this out of the way though: Wife want casual sex Hagan is playing with fire and STDs, crime, all kinds of things a lovely middle-aged man and concerned husband shouldn't be near.

Do not pay women for sex. My other caveat is that I don't believe your wife Longnor fever fit n hung 4 female giving you this "green light.

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She may have said it — but her language choices, to "get it Find discreet sex Leatherhead of your system" leaves me to believe otherwise.

I have told many a man "sure, that's fine, if that casusl make you happy," and not meant a word. Sure, you go on your Wife want casual sex Hagan trip with the boys — I'll go solo to my family wedding, that's totally fiiiiiine.

ssex Completely convinced he'll figure it out, and shocked and hurt when he doesn't. If your wife is taking a page from my book of passive-aggression, this could be dangerous. Casaul you explored the reasons why she's just not that into Wife want casual sex Hagan And why have you only been talking for hours in the last few weeks — instead of the last 19 years?

I consulted a team of experts in the field, literally: Fifty Shades of Grey.

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They told me that one copy circulated around the team: After one wife was done with it, another guy would borrow Housewives looking real sex Ethel Louisiana 70730 — before long, they were all bragging on the bench about how their wives had transformed from cold fish to "animals in the sack.

Sure, I scoffed but by the sounds of it, you should put a copy on her side of the bed. I also told my team that I want Wife want casual sex Hagan be the next in line. I should tell you that they all envy your situation: But to me, you don't sound lucky. So I called a sexologist, a man who has a PhD in human sexuality — Wife want casual sex Hagan ask if you are indeed "living the dream," as my team claims.

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Ever the skeptic, I plead with him that there's no way this can work with you going out on a sexcapade while your wife sits at home. Stephen de Wit, who says he's coached many couples through successful "consensual non-monogamous" relationships.

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We agree you should investigate your mismatched libidos first — but "stepping outside the marriage," as the doctor puts it, can actually help. Once you've discussed all the details, all the emotions and the expectations — how much does she want to to know, Wife want casual sex Hagan often is the sex Hagna, where will it take place, how this new dynamic will play into your regular domestic spats, does Wige also Wife want casual sex Hagan a "green light," etc.

When he comes home, they role play — she Wife wants nsa Minnetonka to ask the questions about his night. Should he have texted more? How much does she want to know is paramount here. The doctor advises — though I can hear him cringing — that a good starting point would be websites targeted to connecting people in committed relationships who are searching for casual sex. There, you should be painstakingly clear that you love your wife in your profile — and look for a woman with the same expectations, the doc says.

I'm still wildly uncomfortable with this — go make sex dant with your wife, I say — but Dr. De Wit says indeed that I'm a prude. I groan Haban most of his sexologist speak Horny woman in Hendley "we've been programmed to think of sex as 3-D — dirty, dangerous, and degrading" — Wife want casual sex Hagan then he says something enlightening that I'll leave you to ponder.


After, of course, you've really tried to make sex better with your wife. This is a space where Wife want casual sex Hagan can engage with each other and Globe staff. Non-subscribers can read and sort comments but will not be able to engage with them in any way. Click here to subscribe.

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Comments that violate our community guidelines will be removed. Commenters casula repeatedly violate community guidelines may be suspended, Wife want casual sex Hagan them to temporarily lose their ability to engage with comments. Read our community guidelines here. Site navigation Your reading history. Article text size A. To view your reading history, you must be logged in.

Open this photo in gallery: Published June Friends and Ilford especially, Updated May 11, Story continues below advertisement.

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