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E verybody wants what feels good. Everyone wants to live a carefree, happy and easy life, to fall in love and have amazing sex ouut relationships, to look perfect and make money and be popular and well-respected and admired and a total baller to the point that people part like the Red Sea when you walk into the room.

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What are you willing to struggle for? Because that seems to be a greater determinant of how our lives turn out. People want to be rich without the riskwithout the sacrifice, without the delayed gratification necessary to accumulate wealth. Everybody wants to have great sex and an awesome relationship — but not everyone is willing to go through the tough conversations, the awkward silences, the hurt feelings and the emotional psychodrama to get there.

And so they settle.

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Because happiness requires struggle. The positive is the side effect of handling the negative. You can only avoid negative experiences for so long before they come roaring back to life. At the core of all human behavior, our needs are more or less similar. Positive experience is easy to handle. People want an amazing physique. People want to start their own business or become financially independent. People want a partner, a spouse. And to get good at dealing with negative experiences is to get good at dealing with life.

And everybody wants something enough. Because if you want the benefits of something in life, you have to also want the costs.

If you want the beach body, you have to want the sweat, the soreness, the early mornings, and the hunger pangs. If you want the yacht, you have to also want fot late Dating mature bbw, the risky business moves, and the possibility of pissing off a person or ten thousand.

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If you find yourself wanting something month after month, year after year, yet nothing happens and you never come any closer to it, then maybe what you actually want is a fantasyan idealization, an image and a false promise.

But I ask because that tells me far more about you than your desires and fantasies. Because you foe to choose something. Pleasure is an easy question. And pretty much all of us have similar answers. The more interesting question is the pain. What is the pain that you want to sustain?

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That answer will actually get you somewhere. For most of my adolescence and young adulthood, I fantasized about being a musician — a rock star, in particular.

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Any badass guitar song I heard, I would always close my eyes and envision myself up on stage playing it to the screams of the crowd, people absolutely losing their minds to my sweet finger-noodling. This fantasy could keep me occupied for hours on end. The fantasizing continued up through college, even after I dropped Generuz man needs massage of music school and stopped playing seriously.

I was biding my time before I could invest the proper amount of time and effort into getting out there and making it work.

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First, I needed to finish school. Then, I needed to make money.

Then, I needed to find the time. Then… and then nothing. Despite fantasizing about this for over half of my life, the reality never came. And it took me a long time and a lot of negative experiences to finally figure out why: And because of that, I failed at it.

I hardly tried at all.

The daily drudgery of practicing, the logistics of finding a group and rehearsing, the pain of finding gigs and actually getting people to show up and give a shit. The broken strings, the blown tube amp, hauling 40 pounds of gear to and from rehearsals with no car.

I just liked to imagine the top. But the truth is far less interesting than that: I wanted the reward and not the struggle.

Who? Me? is a Reverse People Finder website. A site where someone may be trying to find you. Is someone, somewhere, looking for you? I would entertain offers to buy the site if there is anyone out there who wants a great google website page ranking (PR) and search listing placements. 65 Quotes That Will Dare You to Do Great Things. "Because if you're prepared and you know what it takes, it's not a risk. You just have to figure out how to get there. There is always a way to. Problem? You can’t just throw out a body part just because it’s “last season”!!! I mean, I guess you could, but you’re gonna lose a lot of $, time, and blood. And seriously, are you going to let someone else tell you that the way your mother brought you into this world isn’t good enough?.

I wanted the result and not the process. I was in love not with the fight but only the victory.

Who you are is defined by the values you are willing to struggle for. People who enjoy the struggles of a gym are the ones who get in good shape. People who enjoy long workweeks and the politics of the corporate ladder are the ones who move up Wife wants nsa Manter. People who enjoy the stresses and uncertainty of the starving tthere lifestyle are ultimately the ones who live it and make it.

This is the most simple and basic component of life: So choose your struggles wisely, my friend. I also talk about how I found the inspiration for this post, and the relationship between effort and success in writing.

Somrone members can listen to it by clicking the Commentary somelne above. To become a site member, click here. We all think we know ourselves well, but psychological studies show otherwise. In fact, most of us are somewhat deluded about ourselves.

I put together a page ebook explaining how we can come to know ourselves better, just fill out your email in the form. You can opt out at any time. smoeone

See my privacy policy. Related Posts How to Let Go: Join my newsletter and get a free ebook "3 Ideas to Change Your Life". Don't show this again.

When someone is in love they are not embarrassed to show their love. If you are really in love, you're always going to have that special person with you . And that you can tell by just looking at a person their entire outlook. I Know You're Out There Somewhere by The Moody Blues song meaning, lyric interpretation, Sam from Tooele, UtTruly a wonderful song. will use searchlights to scan the audience during the chorus, as to depict looking for that lost love. "I Know You're Out There Somewhere" is a single by the progressive rock band The The Magnificent Moodies · Days of Future Passed · In Search of the Lost Chord · On the Threshold What links here · Related changes · Upload file · Special pages · Permanent link · Page information · Wikidata item · Cite this page .